why does life have to be so damn hard sometimes? it’s like that saying, when it rains it pours. and quite honestly, predicting storms is a tricky business. mostly because nobody knows what’s happening tomorrow or better yet, today.
my body hurts– i’ve been burning the candle at both ends. i’ve recently found a love for pure barre class and i’ve had muscles hurt that i didn’t even know existed. but with that comes the self realization of being healthy…and maybe at times taking it too far.
too far in a sense of peppers and quinoa constitute as a ‘well deserved meal’ and four classes in 72 hours is too much. and so, last night i ate pizza (my favorite thing in this world) and watched vanderpump rules because quite honestly, i deserved it. and wanted to.
i also haven’t been sleeping well. that wind last night resembled somewhat of a monster and clementine wasn’t having it. so, we stayed up giving belly rubs to secure her in that sweet little bed of ours.
^^^thank you to the idiot who broke into our house this past summer and stole our security…clementine’s included^^^
then there’s the comparison in which every human makes to every other human out there. okay, i’m not her. i am me. sometimes flaws are really hard to master… or to get over… or to live with in a sense? being okay in your skin is also a tricky business because there is always doubt, human doubt that manifests itself into thoughts of daily life and the feeling of being good enough sometimes is too far removed.
and to these issues i simply tell life, ‘go fish’.
because i don’t have it. and i’m okay with that. i’ll simply move on and pick another card from the bunch.
a card that will hopefully suit me better.
(and details that will hopefully be presented soon)
and at moments of this self doubt, this insecure feeling that we all have– i thank myself for the things i have and the things i have accomplished. like these two:
^^^i think my love of taking pictures of people while sleep came from my mom. mom, i am thankful for this quality because at these moments everything is perfect and still. and we always have to remember these moments^^^
*this here blog is my real life– not everything stays at equilibrium. and for that, i hope you appreciate the honesty of this post. i needed it.